“My willingness was born out of desperation and experience and its biggest impediment has been my defiance found within an alcoholic insanity.” – Rick W.

Tonight at my home group, the chair proposed the topic of willingness. She read from the 12&12 in Step 3 and it was a perfect reminder for everyone in the room (and certainly for me) that willingness is the key that can open the door to a sobriety maybe hoped for but likely undreamed of for many newcomers.

We heard some beautiful shares around the table from those who’ve both experienced willingness as well as a lack of it and what the consequences were. My quote above came as a combination from several shares I heard as I was trying to develop my own thoughts about it post meeting on the drive home.

I remember when I first came in being asked, ‘are you willing to go to any lengths for sobriety’ and in fairly short order, my answer was yes. But as fast as that thought came, my selfishness, self-centeredness, and sloth got in the way. It became easy for me to come up with all kinds of excuses as to why I didn’t need to do the work. Willingness was not completely thrown out the window, but it certainly took a back seat to the illusion that my life was getting better and that I had something to do with that; that I was the arbiter of my success.

I love how it states in the 12&12 in Step 3 that ‘our whole trouble has been the misuse of willpower.’ Nothing could have been closer to the truth in my case. That old saying we’ve heard in the rooms (not from our literature but from member experience), “I can’t stay drunk today on yesterday’s alcohol any more than I can stay sober today on yesterday’s actions” is so very true.

• “Belief in the power of God, plus enough willingness, honesty and humility to establish and maintain the new order of things, were the essential requirements.“ – Bill’s Story
• “We have emphasized willingness as being indispensable. Are we now ready to let God remove from us all the things which we have admitted are objectionable?” – Into Action
• “Once we have placed the key of willingness in the lock and have the door ever so slightly open, we find that we can always open it some more. Though self-will may slam it shut again, as it frequently does, it will always respond the moment we again pick up the key of willingness.” – Step 3, 12&12

I left the meeting tonight gratefully being reminded that I need to daily look at my level of willingness because I, like so many members, want nothing more than to live the life promised to me of happiness, joyousness, and freedom – but I need to remember that there’s work I must do to get me there.

In love & service,