Posts by: Rick W.

Tradition Four: Learning to Be Free Without Forgetting Others

Tradition Four: Learning to Be Free Without Forgetting Others

From the “Learning to Love Well” blog series on the Twelve Traditions “Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole.” There is something wonderfully liberating about Tradition Four. After Tradition One teaches us that our common welfare comes first, Tradition Two reminds us that no individual is …

When the AA Meeting Isn’t Healthy

When the AA Meeting Isn’t Healthy

In my almost four decades of attending AA meetings, I have been to some incredibly spiritually healthy meetings, and then some that felt like something very different from that. It’s been my experience that groups can develop dysfunctional cultures just like families and organizations can. We walk into Alcoholics Anonymous and often times find something …

Routine Trained My Feet

Routine Trained My Feet

Tonight, the man chairing the discussion meeting at my home group picked what I initially thought was a rather obscure topic: Routine. I have been sitting in A.A. meetings for a long time, and I honestly can’t remember routine coming up very often as the actual topic of a meeting. We talk about resentment. Fear. …

Tradition One: Learning to Put “We” Before “Me”

Tradition One: Learning to Put “We” Before “Me”

From the “Learning to Love Well” blog series on the Twelve Traditions “Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon A.A. unity.” There is something almost counterintuitive about beginning the Twelve Traditions with unity. After all, most of us arrive in A.A. because of an individual problem. I can’t stop drinking. My life …

When AA Suggestions Become Cliché

When AA Suggestions Become Cliché

“Turn it over.” “Acceptance is the answer.” “More will be revealed.” “Just do the next right thing.” “Let go and let God.” Spend enough time around Alcoholics Anonymous and you will hear these phrases hundreds, maybe thousands, of times. And here’s the uncomfortable part: Most of them are true. That’s precisely why we need to be careful …

It’s Not If. It’s When.

It’s Not If. It’s When.

I was sitting in my home group last night when a woman with solid sobriety said something that stopped me. We were talking about the warning on page 85 of the Big Book: “It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels.” She said, essentially, “It’s not …

When a Sponsee Relapses

When a Sponsee Relapses

Where does responsibility end? What belongs to them, and what belongs to me? The phone rings. Or a text arrives. Or the silence finally makes sense. Someone you sponsor has been drinking. Before you can even respond, your internal questions begin. Did I miss something? Was I too demanding? Too available? Not available enough? Should …